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The perils of Christmas by committee

OPINION: From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC.
To: Social club committee.
Subject: Xmas party ideas.
Date: Sept 17, 2010
Hi team. I don't think I need to remind you it's getting close to Christmas time and we need to start planning our social club Christmas party. Last year was such a super-duper event we owe it to our hard-working colleagues to make sure this year is even better! So let's get the grey matter working over the weekend and come up with some awesome ideas to make this Christmas party terrific. Get back to me on Monday. :)
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: Social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 2
Date: Sept 20, 2010
Phew. Welcome back from the weekend. Hope no one has a case of the Mondays. LOL. I've been so busy thinking about ideas for the Christmas party but I haven't had any ideas from you guys yet. Not that I am worried. I know you all have your thinking caps on and are coming up with some absolutely amazing things. Come on guys. Together we can achieve. ;)
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: Social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 3
Date: Sept 24, 2010
Wahey!! It's Friday. TGIF or what? Still no ideas for the Christmas party. What is up? Too busy working, hehehehe. Get back to me next week team. Also just a reminder from HR. We don't need to have alcohol to have fun. But you all knew that. 2EZ.
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: Social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 4
Date: October 4, 2010
Hi Guys. Look, no ideas yet so let's get this week off to a flying start and come up with some today. If we don't get on to it this week we're going to miss out on the good venues and have to have it in the staff room again :) To get you started I have come up with some ideas myself.
1. We could all come dressed as something beginning with X (for Xmas).
2. Mocktail party!!! No hangover :)
3. Jungle theme, coz we're such party animals. Epic LOL.
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: Social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 5
Date: October 8, 2010
Great stuff peeps. So I've had some good ideas from you all this week guys. Unfortunately Bryan, though your idea is super terrific, we cannot have a wet t-shirt contest. There are some serious health and safety issues about water and slippery floors. Susan, HR is also concerned with your idea for a Rastafarian-themed party. They were rapt you would supply your own tree but were worried you might hurt your back carrying it in. Tony, I think you sent me an email meant for someone else. Afterall, is there anything better to do than making sure everyone has a great Christmas party? I don't think so!! Keep the ideas rolling in guys. Meeting on Wednesday.

From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: Social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 6
Date: October 13, 2010
Hi Guys, missed you all at the meeting. Figured you must have thought I meant next Wednesday (total LOL). Let's have one tomorrow!!!!!!!
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: Social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 7
Date: October 14, 2010
Hey teamsters. Sorry guys. By tomorrow I meant today, not tomorrow next week. Hey, big sorry to confuse you because I know you're full of ideas for the meeting. My fail there :) Let's meet on October 20. That's a hump day.
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 7
Date: October 20, 2010
OK, that was good work at the meeting today, even though only two of you showed up. Thanks Ian! Thanks Fran! You're now both honorary members of the social club committee. I agree with you that we need chocolate biscuits at the meetings, however we cannot entertain your suggestion that non-social club members be allowed to join in the social club events for a fee. Some people believe more is merrier but if that is true how do you explain China's one-child policy?
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 8
Date: October 21, 2010
I just wish to apologise for my comments about China. Some of my best friends are Chinese and I love sweet and sour pork.
From: Sheryl Jane, President SCC
To: social club committee
Subject: Xmas party ideas 8
Date: October 22, 2010
Hey team. It seems some of you aren't interested in being part of the social club committee and have formed a new "get together" committee. I think that is so awesome but you should know the staff room's booked out for December 22 and HR is already working on the mocktail recipes.
P.S. Please note, non social club members can attend.
- Taranaki Daily News

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